SELEDA Ethiopia


Editors' Note
My Story
Evil Blanks
Is Paranoia...
Just Because...
Of Paranoia...
It Was-It Wasn't
Seleda Salutes
Top Ten
Do The Right Thing

Top Ten Ethiopian Reality Shows

10. Who Wants to be a Millionaire's lackey? A series of humiliating contests to see how low you would be willing to go to be in the entourage of a millionaire (this is also applicable for homegrown billionaires).

9. DinqEm Joe Millionaire (or Joe Millionaire B'lo Zm): A would-be investor/millionaire visiting Addis who dates a number of lovely young women, all of whom believe (erroneously) that he has a fabulous mansion and loads of money to go with his American passport and recently mezerzer'ed dollaahrs.

8. Real Worll’ed: A camera is hidden in the examination hall of Saint Joseph during the Matric exams -- will they all copy off of Tiruneh the Brain's answer sheet? Or is that a picture of Kuki in a bathing suit that's circulating?

7. Survivor: Moos'na Central: MegenaNa drivers' license examiners and Wereda frd bEt judges are forced to go a whole week without accepting or initiating a single bribe. Secretly, the program organizers have put a tempting array of beautiful women and rich men on their daily agendas. Who will last till the end?

6. Ethiopian Idol: The song? Tizita. The challenge? How many different ways can you sing this most revered of popular anthems? Slow croon? Reggae beat? These are good, yes, but they’ve been done. Can you do the acid-jazz version? the Bhangra version? Bluegrass? Mariachi? Bossa nova? Metal? Zydeco? New age? Opera? Dancehall? Techno? Soca? Flamenco? Highlife? Ska? House? Polka? Siberian throat singing? Reign supreme as the globalized Tizita dimSawi of all time!

5. While your Debal Was Out : A team of eviction experts help you move your debal out of the house before she returns from her nth visit to meksess yo’ ass at the wereda frd bEt. You have one hour to pack up her things, recover all the items you find in her rooms that had mysteriously disappeared from your house, and change the locks. A special team will go to key spots in the neighborhood to share stories of how she had meekly come looking for a meTegya but then ended up taking over your entire servees. Will you be done in time? Will the neighbors rise up to help you or her?

4. Fear Factor: Night in Merkato : Four persons are left in Amerikan gibi to fend for themselves for one night. In addition to the clothes on their backs, each will be given a pack of cigarettes, a nail clipper, thirty birr, a jar of Vicks, a can of tomato salsa, 3 festal and a merfé qulf. Can they survive marathon hours at CHat terra? Will the drenched-in-second-hand-oil sambussa from Medgem Aychalim Pasti BEt finally do them in? Will a disgruntled mechanic from SumalE Terra put a beheaded gebsimma doro in the gabina of their Ford Wrangler?

3. Who Wants to Marry My Father? Harried children attempt to marry off their father. Their mother is divorcing the womanizing, cranky old man – she wants some peace and quiet before she dies, she has calmly stated. None of his kids wants to deal with his flatulent, dictatorial ways – besides, their spouses have already declared war. They figure some lonely baltEt empty-nester would love to take him off their hands, and they’re willing to throw in a condo and free groceries for life to sweeten the pot.

2. Temptation Island: This could be it! Picture Langano, and two private mansions…one with 10 gorgeous men, the other with 10 gorgeous women. Bring in five married couples, sick and tired of each other after 7 years of marriage, looking to bump nasties with anyone who’s willing. They split up for the two weeks. But there is one catch – there are no condoms on the island and at least five men and seven women on the island are HIV positive. Join us for the two-hour finale when the truth comes out!

1. BolE Eye for the Fara Guy : Five BolE molqaqoch kidnap Faras from Shola who wear white socks with black shoes and convert them into people even they would date.

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