The HIV/AIDS Issue

"In the beginning," noted the author of the fourth Gospel in the New Testament, "was the Word." The confusion, appreciation, perversion and devotion about, for, of and to this celebrated origin is the source for all salvation, doom, hatred and bliss. The Battle of Adwa was fought over the meaning of one article snuck in a treaty of friendship; the colors red and white were contracted to slaughter thousands of Ethiopians in the mid 1970's; the mere mention of an acronym of any given political party we love to hate causes our mouths to froth; the supercilious rise of the left eyebrow ignites many a barroom brawl at Adams Morgan Bereha; and the declarations made at a finish line of a track or marathon race catapults us into a frenzy of unified jubilation.

Ineho the Communications Issue!

We need to know how you finally managed to arrange the words the right way and get the girl or boy; we want to laugh from the blunders you suffered when you thought of the appropriate word in our mother tongue and uttered the unsuitable word in English (or Korean, not to exclude those of you who have comfortably settled in Pyongyang); we implore you to e-mail us the transcription of the incantation you used to heal the wounds of the bitter family feuds we cannot live without; we urge you to share the moment you were busted by your loved one and were rendered speechless.

Deadline is December 15^thfor all of you. (20^th for residents of Pyongyang.)

Communicate.

The Sex Issue : February 2002

Ay-hey-hey… wedEt wedEt. Long after we've been pegged "undersexed, desperate dorks" by those who, well, aren't, ineho proof that we might really, really …ere le werE'm ayamech.

OK… so, this is the Sex Issue. Ah…the "S" word, feared and adored in Ethiopian society…that confounding mixture of promiscuity and piety all wrapped in one neat dr'b neTela teeming with tension and confusion. We're blasé about CHn gereds but, ho-ho-ho, let an adult woman wear a strapless dress, and it's all "waiter, I will have an extra large kenfer memTeT with my outrage". Conversely, are we Diasporic Ethiopians over sexualized? Is there something to be said for ET inhibitions?

In layman's terms, at what point do issues of sex, fidelity, freedom, love, passion, lust, secrets and fantasies… megenaNet? Is our sense of piousness six feet or six inches deep? Are we capable of deep, hard thoughts about the myth and reality of sex in our society? Where is our emotional bed at? Do we have the tolerance to openly talk about sex, or are we going to just medabess the issue and not thrust to the core of the matter? Are we able to come, collectively, to an agreement, or are we doomed to always mafen our screams of ecstasy or frustration? What was the orgy-nal sin? Kama Sutra? You wish-imma!

UUUUUuhhhhhh?

Listen, we just ask the questions, aiight! Because we are proof positive that some reproductive organs should NOT reproduce, we look towards you, oh sage SELEDAwiyan, to help us address some of these issues. Enlighten us. High time for some frank, fr'T-rT , healthy discussion.

Speaking of high…we're done here. Articles are due on or before January 15

The Depression & Ecstasy Issue: March 2002

To dig or not to dig? To poke, to puncture, perchance to bleed? MoyalEs can be painful, no? Yes they can. The distress of walking on a damaged heel because that miserable little wretch decided to dig itself into your body. Imagine that! YOUR body, damn it! And there it is, lodged comfortably in your heel, the pride and soul of your flawless walk and prance. There it is, grinning ad infinitum, while you huff and puff in an effort to dare the needle. That bastard! Your heel will never be the same again. Never! Imagine the expenses for psychiatric care to nurse your severely damaged self-esteem … all on account of that miniscule wretch. Yet abatu, ya agdim-adeg!

Is the perfect heel too much to ask for? Imagine the joy, the sheer bliss of waking up and looking at a flawless, smooth heel, sans intruder infestation. It would even make the most menial, tedious jobs seem like heaven.

In all seriousness, March is our "Depression and Ecstasy" issue. The hours spent fiddling and toying with sanity while itching from depression bites … momentous outbursts of ecstatic celebration that would put to shame the CHiffera and dinfata of a igir-aTabi who got promoted to Tegur-astekakai … folks, here's your chance to tell us your stories. Come hither and vent; our support group welcomes thee.

So … all megl-yeQuaTeru terekezoch due on the 15th of February? 17th, if u have pedicured feet.

GUIDELINES